同一首诗翻译活动（第二期）

Hermes

第一期终于落幕了，不过有兴趣的同学可以继续回帖。第二期我们要翻译的是这首：

Heraclitus

They told me, Heraclitus, they told me you were dead;
They brought me bitter news to hear and bitter tears to shed;
I wept, as I remembered, how often you and I
Had tired the sun with talking, and sent him down the sky.

And now that thou art lying, my dear old Carian guest,
A handful of grey ashes, long, long ago at rest,
Still are thy pleasant voices, thy nightingales, awake;
For Death, he taketh all away, but them he cannot take.

        -- William Johnson Cory






Cory的诗是对古希腊诗人Callimachus的翻译。下面是水建馥对Callimachus原诗的翻译和注释：

人说赫拉克利图斯故去，引动我
热泪流，想当年我两人
常在谈话间送夕阳下山。如今你
这哈利卡涅客人久已化成灰。
但你那些夜莺还活着，冥王
能捉走一切却捉不走它们。

注释1：赫拉克利图斯是一位小亚细亚西南哈利卡涅城的诗人。
注释2：“夜莺”可能是指赫拉克利图斯的诗篇，也可能是指他的美妙动听的谈话。

A. W. Mair's 的英译本供参考：
One told me, Heracleitus, of thy death and
  brought me to tears, and I remembered how often we two in talking put the
  sun to rest. Thou, methinks, Halicarnasian friend, art ashes long and long
  ago; but thy nightingales live still, whereon Hades, snatcher of all
  things, shall not lay his hand.

张祈

参与一下:


Heraclitus
赫拉克利特


They told me, Heraclitus, they told me you were dead;
They brought me bitter news to hear and bitter tears to shed;
I wept, as I remembered, how often you and I
Had tired the sun with talking, and sent him down the sky.

And now that thou art lying, my dear old Carian guest,
A handful of grey ashes, long, long ago at rest,
Still are thy pleasant voices, thy nightingales, awake;
For Death, he taketh all away, but them he cannot take.

        -- William Johnson Cory


他们告诉我，赫拉克利特，他们说你已经死去；
他们给我带来痛苦的消息，让我流下痛苦的泪；
我哭泣，当我回忆起，你和我有多少次
令太阳疲倦的畅谈，直到它从天空下坠。

如今，你静卧着，我亲爱的卡里亚的老贵宾，
一把灰白的骨殖，很久很久前就已经安息，
尽管你愉悦的嗓音，你的夜莺依然苏醒；
死神，他把一切抓走，却对它们无能为力。

（张祈 译）

assking

看到晏几道“舞低杨柳楼心月”一句，突然想到tied the sun....

Bernhardt

Halicarnassus是Caria最大的城市。Cory这么称呼，是为了符合音韵。

Hermes

Caria是一个地名，音译就好了，Carian就是Caria人。

Bernhardt

就是卡里亚吧
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caria

knifeling

Heraclitus

They told me, Heraclitus, they told me you were dead;
They brought me bitter news to hear and bitter tears to shed;
I wept, as I remembered, how often you and I
Had tired the sun with talking, and sent him down the sky.

And now that thou art lying, my dear old Carian guest,
A handful of grey ashes, long, long ago at rest,
Still are thy pleasant voices, thy nightingales, awake;
For Death, he taketh all away, but them he cannot take.

        -- William Johnson Cory

赫拉克利特

他们告诉我，赫拉克利特，他们告诉我你死了
他们带给我悲痛的消息和泪涛
我哭泣，当我想起，多少次你我长谈
直至太阳疲倦，沉入海渊

现在，我亲爱的Carian客人，你已入眠
一抔青土，随你，已沉睡多年
但是啊，死神带走一切，却无法带走
夜莺般的，欢唱着，你美丽的歌喉


这个“Carian”究竟是什么意思？
呵呵，让各位见笑。

木头

不过我承认，我翻译的时候是读一遍过去，把生词找出来后，在心里用中文翻译了一遍就打出来了，过程用不到十几分钟啦。

木头

是啊。偶遇到不懂的单词就用了词霸，所以就错了。
但是我不会用翻译工具进行机械翻译。还是用了点脑子滴。

assking

专有名词不用词霸怎么晓得呢？。。。不过我用的不是金山。